Arise Healing Community

A private membership group for Christian women
on a healing journey from the trauma of
spiritual and covert emotional and
psychological spousal abuse

Are you wondering if you can ever heal from the
emotional and psychological spousal abuse
that’s devastated your soul, your heart, and your life?

Are you wondering if you’ll ever trust yourself again?

~ If you’re divorced but you wonder if you’ll ever fully heal, feel alive again, and be at peace…

~ If you’re separated yet fighting despair and fear, and wondering if you’re broken heart will ever heal…

~ If you’re still married and feeling like you can’t cope with all the confusion and questioning your sanity, and you’re exhausted from the relationship consuming your thoughts…

There is hope.

~ If you’re struggling with anxiety, fear, depression, brain fog, self-doubt, loneliness, PTSD, and even having a hard time getting off the couch…

~ If you no longer feel close to the Lord and have a hard time trusting Him…

~ If you feel like you don’t even know who you are anymore…

There is hope.

You really can get off this emotional roller coaster.

You really can find yourself again.

You really can heal.

The first step is to understand why you're feeling so
overwhelmed and hopeless.

The reason why you're stuck (and a solution)

I never found the deep healing I was looking for until I understood that trauma affects our bodies in such a way that we are easily, and constantly, overwhelmed by emotions we can’t control. Trauma breaks our connection to our body, heart, and mind, to others, and to God.

It’s very normal for an abuse victim to develop PTSD responses (fight, flight, freeze or appease) and a dysregulated nervous system. Our emotions and reactions are originating in our over-reactive body, not in our thoughts.

It’s like being on a runaway train.
When we learn to slow down the train, we gain control over our thoughts and feelings once again, and we can then more easily heal them.

I know you’re probably blaming yourself for not doing better and not being able to “get it together.” But in reality, you’re getting hijacked by your body and that doesn’t make you a weak or bad person.

It’s not your fault!
And there’s something you can do about it.

There’s been a lot of research on trauma over the last few decades. Experts have discovered that coping with, and healing from, the trauma of abuse needs a different approach than just talking about what happened and renewing our mind.

Thankfully, effective tools have been developed. These tools are rarely talked about by doctors, or even counselors, and my dream is to help emotional and psychological spousal abuse survivors learn these tools so the suffering and pain can stop!

When you understand how trauma has affected you, you can learn how to manage your overwhelming feelings and find self-compassion and emotional stability again.

Remember the last time you were triggered from a conversation and you couldn’t think straight and your heart was thumping….?

Imagine what it would be like to have the tools to be able to calm that triggered feeling and quiet yourself down.

No more sitting in panic for hours.
Instead you can see things more clearly and make better decisions.

I created this community because my passion is to share these concrete tools with you.

Join the waitlist to be notified when Arise opens for enrollment again in the Fall of 2020

What's Inside Arise?

Education

Teachings on topics relevant to covert psychological and emotional spousal abuse survivors and trauma healing.

Community

Daily support from other survivors as well as online gatherings. Isolation amplifies our suffering, but an understanding community diminishes it.

Healing

A guided journey designed to calm and heal your heart, your mind, your spirit, and your trauma-reactive brain and nervous system.

We have all known the long loneliness, and we have found that the answer is community. ~ Dorothy Day

When you become part of the Arise Community, you’ll get:

Teaching on topics such as:
~ trauma and PTSD

~ getting free from trauma bonding, cognitive dissonance and brainwashing
~ healing your mind, emotions, and spirit
~ reclaiming, trusting, and loving yourself
~ recovering from spiritual abuse and trusting Jesus again
~ sorting out truth and lies
~ detaching
~ boundaries
~ parenting
~ preparing for divorce, and more

A variety of tools for reducing and healing trauma and PTSD, with group coaching to help the tools become easy, go-to resources.

Monthly Q and A with Helena.

A private online community with other survivors.

Arise is a monthly subscription based community.
The cost is $24 a month or $240 for a year.

Nobody can “treat” a war, or abuse, rape, molestation … what has happened cannot be undone. But what can be dealt with are the imprints of the trauma on body, mind, and soul: the crushing sensations in your chest that you may label as anxiety or depression; the fear of losing control; always being on alert for danger or rejection; the self-loathing; the nightmares and flashbacks; the fog that keeps you from staying on task and from engaging fully in what you are doing; being unable to fully open your heart to another human being.
~ Bessel van der Kolk, author of "The Body Keeps the Score"

What makes Arise unique?

~ You’ll be led on a gentle, guided path taking you step by step into strengthening, clarity, growth, and freedom for your mind and heart.

~ You’ll understand how trauma affects your brain and your healing process, in ways you may not even realize yet, and what to do about it. You’ll understand why thought and belief therapy hasn’t been as effective as you’d hoped.

~ You’ll learn practical tools for dealing with the overwhelming emotions that flood you during and after abuse such as anxiety, doubt, fear, anger, hopelessness, confusion, depression, and torment.

~ You’ll focus on the healing tools you need rather than on more information about abuse. That information is on my website, but this group will be focused and calming.

~ You’ll find freedom from the guilt and shame you feel about your emotional world being so unstable. You’ll learn that you don’t have a character flaw that’s keeping you stuck, and that you can’t “just get over it.”

~ You’ll be able to make good decisions and be consistent with healing self-care when you learn how to calm your mind, body, and emotions.

~ You’ll know how to rebuild an intentional and beautiful life for yourself after divorce.

~ You’ll rediscover the Jesus you once fell in love with, be set from spiritual guilt, and be able to rest in the Lord and receive His love.

~ You’ll develop the self-compassion and get the encouragement, support, and hope you need to do the hard work of healing.

~ You’ll know if you need to work more deeply with a counselor and exactly what to look for when choosing one.

~ You’ll know you can heal. As a survivor of childhood, spousal and spiritual abuse, I lived in torment for 56 years. I know God wants us to be completely healed because He made it possible for me!

“When I began using to tools that Helena teaches, I was super skeptical. I’d never heard of anything like them, and they seemed a bit far out to me. I’ve never been too open minded that way. Now I’ll be the first to tell you that since I started learning about the science behind these techniques and using them in my life, they have changed everything for me.

What I’ve learned from Helena is priceless. She taught me how trauma, PTSD, and triggering was affecting my brain and body. I was struggling with so many things and then blaming myself for how I was feeling and reacting. Helena helped me see that those were physiological responses from years of repetitive emotional abuse, and not reactions I could control by just changing my thoughts. They were causing the disregulation of my nervous system, and wreaking havoc in my mind, emotions, and body. I was desperate for healing.

Since I left my husband a year and a half ago and started working with Helena, I understand the reality of what was going on inside of me, and practice the techniques she teaches. They have changed my life. I’m no longer the shell of a women I used to be. In fact, I'm a completely different person. I’ve stepped out of the effects of abuse and into a life I never knew possible. My future is bright and my heart is alive. Healing is possible and the evidence has proven it - and I owe it all to Helena’s coaching and what she has taught me.”
— Tanya S.

Meet your gentle healing guide

Helena Knowlton

I’ve survived a lifetime of abuse– childhood sexual abuse, being in a Christian cult for years, and being married to a covert psychological abuser for 19 years. I’ve also survived several suicide attempts. My life is amazing now- really, I still can hardly believe what it’s like to be fully healed and at peace.

I divorced my covertly abusive husband in 2011. Then I started my long journey of healing. I did talk therapy and sought God all day, every day for healing. I came a long way and thought I was as healed as I could get.

Then, in 2013, my body collapsed on me. I spent over a year bedridden and almost died. When I told my naturopath my story, he gave me the missing piece– he suggested that I learn about trauma healing. Because I’m a researcher, I dug deeply into learning about trauma healing with everything in me.

As I understood how the trauma was still affecting me, I began my journey into the incredibly deep healing that changed my life. I finally discovered what it was like to live in true peace when the trauma from my life was completely healed.

Since then, trauma healing has become my passion. I’ve done years of research and trained with Bessel van der Kolk and other trauma experts. I’ve been coaching abused women one-on-one and I love it, but seeing their progress has made me want to help more women than I can reach in individual coaching.

That’s why I’m excited to offer you a journey of healing for your soul, and peace with your loving God.

I know you can live in peace with the past, live free in the present,
and have hope for the future.

Sometimes, reaching out and taking someone's hand is the beginning of a journey. At other times, it’s allowing another to take yours. ~ Vera Nazarian

I’ve been helping abused women of faith for over 6 years.
If we could sit down for tea right now, here’s what I’d say to you:

I believe you and I believe in you. I believe in your goodness, strength, courage, kindness, and integrity. I believe in your ability to love others, God, and yourself, even if you don’t feel like you can. I know you’ve done your very best in an impossible situation, and I know God sees you, understands, and loves you deeply.

You aren’t at fault for the abuse or what it’s done to you. You aren’t the problem and you don’t need to be afraid of yourself. You’ve been deeply affected by brainwashing, blame, guilt, self-doubt, confusion, and trauma. But you can find yourself again. And you can learn how to trust God again.

You can heal. You can make it– you just need the right tools. And if you use these tools, the journey will be easier and faster. You’ll love the woman you’ll become (she’s in there somewhere, no matter how empty you feel!) It’s so worth the work to become the you God created you to be.

When we experience our inner life with compassion, love, and acceptance, it changes us and we are less frightened of our self and our life.

“Before Helena taught me this technique I was confused and really felt out of place in my own skin. As a Christian, I’m very wary about what kinds of help I receive, not wanting to fall into something dishonouring to God. So I was cautious, but I do know the effects trauma can have on the brain and I understand how much stress affects the body so what she was explaining to me made perfect sense.

When she started to walk me through the technique I felt a little goofy at first but every time we got to a certain spot in the technique I felt something and pretty soon breakthroughs were coming. My brain and my body were connecting and revealing issues I had stuffed that were causing emotional distress. After the technique I felt more like myself, I felt lighter and I didn’t feel confused anymore. It was like I had just been released from my emotional prison.

This technique is not a one time magic cure however. I did sometimes slip back into those negative feelings. But that’s when I would continue doing it on my own with the same positive results. It’s so simple yet such a game changer for me!”
— Shelley

Frequently Asked Questions

What’s the difference between Arise and your free FB community?
There’s only so far you can go in the free group. It’s great for realizing you are being abused and getting support and confirmation. But I’m not able to take you on a guided healing path in that group. In Arise, that’s what you’ll get.

What’s the time commitment? I’m already overwhelmed with all the information out there!
I totally understand that! The teachings in Arise will be released slowly to keep you from being overwhelmed. You’ll get bite sized information each week and you can go at your own pace along the guided healing journey.

How much does it cost?
$24 a month, billed monthly (which you can cancel at any time) or $240 for a year’s subscription (non-refundable).

What if I don’t want my husband to see the charge on my credit card?
You can pay with a preloaded VISA gift card or have a friend use their card and pay them back.

What if I’m really confused about whether I’m being abused, if he’s changing, and whether to stay or leave?
In Arise you’ll learn tools to help you to sort this out. I understand this confusion- I lived in it for years. The loving community of women will also help and support you.

What if I’m just an emotional wreck- angry one day and depressed the next?
Arise is perfect for you. You’ll learn all about how to calm the wild swings of emotions and understand what is driving all this instability. And even better, you‘ll learn how to create a stable internal world by calming the panic that’s underneath the emotional overwhelm.

What if I’m already seeing a counselor?
Great!! Arise will complement the counseling you're already doing. The courses will probably give you insights to share with your counselor. But best of all, you’ll have a community of friends to walk the journey with who know exactly what you are going through.

Do I need to see a counselor in addition to Arise?
For some women, depending on the complexity of the abuse they’ve suffered, and if they’ve also experienced childhood abuse, other therapy, (especially EMDR therapy) is needed for complete healing. The tools you’ll learn in Arise will help prepare you for deeper therapy and can make it easier.

What if I’m still married?
No problem! You will learn tools to help you whether you want to stay married, want to figure out if you should leave, or are ready to leave. Arise will strengthen you in your mind, heart and spirit so you can leave when you’re ready, or stay with more peace.

What if I’m afraid of all the work involved in healing?
This is a safe place, so no one will force you to do anything you aren’t ready for. But you may find that the trauma-based tools will make the work easier than anything else you’ve tried. When we try to heal our pain using only talk therapy and our mind, we can get lost in the feelings. But when we use tools that calm down the emotions, the healing is less brutal. I’m not saying there’s a magic potion here, because there’s no getting around the fact that being abused is incredibly painful and it does take work to heal. But life doesn’t have to overwhelm you!

What if I don’t think it will work for me?
There are many different tools available. Some work for some women, and others work for others. I’ll be teaching a variety of tools so you’ll be able to find the ones that work for you.

Our capacity to destroy one another is matched by our capacity to heal one another. Restoring relationships and community is central to restoring well-being.
~ Bessel van der Kolk